The Amazing Race: That is Studly

(S13E09) Oh my. We’re really getting down to the wire for this season of The Amazing Race, aren’t we? Four teams remain going into this leg and we all know the big finale is between the final three teams. It seems like the season just started! But then I think of the teams who have been long gone — Arthur and Anita as well as my early favorites, Mark and Bill (the comic book guys). I’m definitely satisfied with two of the teams going into tonight’s episode. One team, not so much. But one team really shouldn’t be there. Read on!

Team Dandrew, the inept get more inept
How are these two still in the running? I mentioned last week that although Terence annoyed me to no end, Terence and Sarah should have stayed in longer than these two doofus boys. Once again, tonight was no exception in their continued buffoonery and bumbling dunderhead ways. Now, I’m not saying they’re bad people, mind you. I think they’re probably very nice guys. They’re just so bad at everything from reading the clues to performing the tasks that I find it mind-boggling they’re still on my TV screen.

Last week, they stupidly left their shoes at the Detour. This week they spent more money than they should have at an airport shoe store on the way from Kazakhstan to Moscow. In the Detour tonight, they misread a clue again and didn’t realize they had to keep their military uniforms on when they tried to switch tasks. I’m not really sure what I can say about Dan’s marching. Um … horrific? I went through major knee surgery and had to march in physical therapy. Had I marched like he did, they would have had to rip my knee apart again. That’s more than just being uncoordinated. That was outright bizarre. As my grandfather would have said, “Sumthin’s not right with that boy.”

I was surprised they made it through serving the borscht without accidentally spilling it on someone’s head. Sure, they thought they were entertaining the Russian troops. But no. The soldiers weren’t laughing with them; they were laughing at them! Later, when they couldn’t pay the good cabbie (due to spending too much on shoes), I was kind of hoping the cabbie would make them disrobe, take all of their belongings, and leave ‘em naked at the curb. Maybe he could have given them sandwich signs which read “We’re silly and stupid boys.”

Starr doesn’t take not doing well so well
Nick and Starr have been an incredibly strong team. But their relationship hasn’t been tested under the stress of a possible last place finish yet. That is, until tonight. Nick pretty much kept his cool, but Starr got way antsy and panicky as their luck went from bad to worse. I think it’s great that she and Dallas seem to have a real attraction to each other, but she showed a side I didn’t like so much tonight. However, I still wouldn’t have any problem with this team winning it all. (But I’d love a Dallas and Toni win!)

The Russians are coming! The Russians are coming!
Well, actually, I guess it was the Americans coming. But I couldn’t resist paying homage to a great classic movie. It’s kind of amazing when you think about it — 40 or 50 years ago, no Americans would be playing a game racing around the world through Russia with Russian citizens and military a part of it all. Stunning architecture, smiling soldiers, and even a surly bakery lady with funny lines. “He’s not fit,” she said of Nick. Of course, that was before she saw Dan. I loved the quotes from Toni about being respectful and reverent when in the monastery even though it wasn’t their faith. Now, that’s the kind of American we need out there representing us as they travel through foreign countries.

A great finish, except …
Well, I knew it. I crunched my numbers and knew tonight had to be the next to last non-elimination leg of the show. There’s always one in the final three so that it’s three teams vying for the win. There are three non-elimination legs in the race, so tonight had to be one. I would have felt better had it saved Nick and Starr. But, no. It saved Beavis and Butthead. One of them said, “We’re the underdogs. People love to see the underdogs win it all.” Um … no, not in this case. There’s a difference between underdogs and bumbling dunderheads who are their own worst enemies. I hope the speed bump next week knocks out their undercarriage.

However, I’m thrilled that Toni and Dallas finally got a first place showing at the Pit Stop! They won a trip to the Dominican Republic and I bet they’re going to have a great time. I’m also happy that Nick and Starr beat the dunderheads even if it was non-Philimination.

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